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Assorted Mommy, Mommy! Jokes

son: Mommy, Mommy! Daddy's on fire!
mom: Hurry up and get the marshmallows!

son: Mommy, Mommy! Why is daddy running away?
mom: Shut up, and help me reload the shotgun!

son: Mommy, Mommy! Can I play in the sandbox?
mom: Not until I find a better place to bury Daddy.

son: Mommy, Mommy! I don't want to go to Australia.
mom: Shut up son and keep swimming.

[Run Over]
son: Mommy, Mommy! Suzi got run over by a steamroller.
mom: Shut up and get the maple syrup.

son: Mommy, Mommy, I don't know how to play poker.
mom: Shaddup and deal.

son: Mommy, Mommy, Why am I running around in circles?
mom: Shutup, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor.

son: Mommy, Mommy! My head hurts!
mom: Shut up and get away from the dart board!

son: Mommy, Mommy! I don't like fishing.
mom: Shut up and stop squirming.

The jokes in this section are for a mature audience
If you are above 18, then you may read them
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